Return to Blobbingrad,

by Pat

I was visiting my best friend and we got into a discussion about giants.

Todd, my friend, asked me about "Gulliver's Travels."

"Did you ever wonder that maybe it was NOT a work of fiction but there just might be an island full of giants?"

I snickered.
"Well, he did put maps in his book. Perhaps he used Gulliver because he feared people would not believe him."

"True. So why has no one found that island of giants?"

"Fear. A lot of people are afraid of giants."

"True. Aren't you?"

"Of course. But I'm also very curious. I want to find Blobbingrad and wish you to join me in my voyage."

"Sure, why not? I have some time off from work and doubt you'll ever find it anyway."

"Oh, scoff if you must," my friend said half-jokingly. "I must," I replied likewise.

Several days later, we set sail with a crew of 12. For several days it was a quiet journey. Then a tremendous storm hit. The crew worked with courage and great might to keep the boat from sinking. Todd fell out of the boat as it rocked.

"Todd!" I screamed out. The storm subsided but there was still a big wave even though the winds were calm now. I was to be astounded by what I saw.

A giant hand holding Todd placed him gently in the boat. Then two giant hands lifted the boat. A giant young girl of about 13 surveyed us with curiosity.

I whispered to Todd, "I believe you've found Blobbingrad."
"I believe I have," he whispered back.
"Is that Glumdalclitch?"
"Perhaps one of her relatives."

Then the girl's voice boomed out, "Do not worry. I will not harm you but I must show you to Her Royal Majesty. My name is Svelena."
"Nice to meet you. I am Todd."
"I am Patrick."

The girl brought us to Queen Uxabella who seemed amused at the sight of two little men in a boat.

The Queen said, "It has been a long while since we have had tiny visitors. Svelena, your great grandmother once cared for a tiny man named Gulliver. Welcome, my small guests. Svelena, please take them out of the boat."

Svelena lifted us out of the boat and placed us on a pillow on a huge coffee table.

"Hand me their boat," the Queen commanded.

Svelena obeyed.

The Queen took the boat and amazingly snapped it in two.

"Why did you do that?" Todd and I hollered simataneously.

"Because it appears we are the ONLY land of people our size in the world and we do not want you to go back and lead curiosity seekers here. However, Svelena will be allowed to stay in the castle and see to all your needs. The Handmaiden will ready your dollhouse."

Shortly, we were inside the dollhouse, and the Queen fearing an attempted escape had also caged the dollhouse. We were trapped in an island of giants...

Todd sat in a corner of the dollhouse curled up in a ball.

"Todd, now what?" I asked.
Todd whimpered.
"What's the matter?"
"She snapped our boat."
"I know. We're stranded."
"It's not that. My crew. What of my crew?"
"Omigosh. I forgot about them. Are they...?"
"I don't know, man. I just don't know..."
Suddenly, the dollhouse shook. It was Queen Uxabella who had come to check on us. Todd hurridly got up and looked up at the Queen and hollered, "Murderer!"

"My goodness. Such a brave little man or foolhardy one to make such an accusation against one who could squish him with her thumb," said the Queen.

The Queen lifted the cage off the dollhouse and picked up Todd. "Now, praytell me what you are talking about, little man, before I am tempted to REALLY become a murderer."
"You snapped our boat. My crew was inside."
The Queen laughed.
"That's funny?!?!" hollered Tod angrily.
"Take care, little man, on how you speak with me. ALL of your crew are safe. When I snapped the boat, they fell onto my soft lap. You must not have noticed. Each one is safely with a Blobbingradian family."

"Oh...I am..sorry."
"There are laws here against talking harshly with the Queen. You must be punished."

"Are you going to..." Todd swallowed. "...kill me?"

The Queen laughed once again.
"Of course not. But some public humiliation is in order."

The Queen then lifted ME out of the cage. "Handmaiden Svelena, gather a crowd in the Royal Gardens. They are in for a show tonight."

A little later, Todd and I found ourselves tied a rock in the gardens.

The Queen called Svelena over.
"Handmaiden, do you have loyalty to your Queen?"
"I do. will not harm them."
"No, just a bit of humiliation. Now go and bring me Patrick."

Svelena untied me and brought me over to the Queen.
"Wait!" Todd hollered. "I thought you were going to humilate me--I was the one who broke the law."
"Yes," the Queen replied. "Your humiliation is watching your friend get humiliated."
Todd sighed.
The Queen raised me up to eye level and asked me if I had ever swung on a rope in my childhood. "I have," I replied.

The Queen looked around and motioned for a young woman of about 20 who had very long pigtails to come over.
"What is your name, child?"
"Lucena, take this little man and tie him up in one of your pigtails."
"Your Majesty?"
"Just do it, please."
The girl curtsied and soon I found myself tied up in her right pigtail.
"Svelena, would you give us some music?" the Queen asked.

Svelena obeyed turning on some music that sounded much like swing.
"How appropos," the Queen snickered.
"Now, you know how to dance, Lucena?"
Lucena nodded.
"Then do so."

Lucena whispered to me that she was sorry and only obeying Her Majesty's Law.

As she danced her pigtail swung wildly taking me with it. It was like being on one of those "flip-over" amusement rides. Even though I was tied up, I feared I woud fall. I clutched tightly onto Lucena's curl and rubber band.

After about 5 minutes, the Queen commanded for her to stop. Lucena untied me and placed me on the floor and stepped back and looked down at me. I was very dizzy. I wandered around in circles. The giant crowd laughed. She kneeled down again and said, "I am truly sorry. I will see if I can get permission to see you later."

The Queen said, "Svelena, please bring me Todd."
Svelena did as commanded.

"Place him on the floor with Patrick." She did.
"Patrick, are you okay?" asked Todd.
I nodded. "Just a bit dizzy."
Suddenly, a giant baby got loose from her mother and began crawling toward us. We looked around for an escape route. There was none. The Queen and the crowd seemed quite bemused by our predicament. Then a giant chubby hand grabbed Todd and slowly brought Todd toward his mouth...

The giant baby lifted Todd toward his mouth.

I tried to grab Todd out of the baby's grip but he was too big and strong. Never in my wildest dreams did I ever think I would be weaker than a baby.

Suddenly, one of the Queen's men rushed in and hollered, "Your Majesty! There is an emergency! There is a giant tidal wave headed for our island!"

The crowd let out a gasp and the room cleared out. Even the Queen left. The mother grabbed her baby and he dropped Todd. I held out both my arms and caught Todd.

"Umph!" I said as Todd fell into my arms.
"Is the honeymoon over?"
"FUN-EEE. Boy, you're heavy."
I let Todd down.
"Knock off those do-nuts, huh?"
"Yeah, right."
"A tidal wave? We're in trouble. A drop of water is like a tidal wave to us."
Todd nodded.

Todd said, "However, it does appear they've forgotten about us."
I nodded. Then we heard this clacking noise.
"What is that?" I asked.
"I don' I make a suggestion?"

As I turned around behind me, I saw a cockroach the size of a St. Bernard. We ran very fast the other way. But in our zeal to escape the giant roach, we ran smack into a giant spider web. We were stuck. We tried to break free of the web but it was of no use.

"I wonder what will get us first: the spider or the roach," Todd said.
"Nice thoughts."
Suddenly, the ground shook.

"Todd? Patrick?"

It was Lucena's voice. "Down here in the spider's web!" we both hollered. But was Lucena was in the middle of the room and we were in the corner. Our voices were too tiny to carry across the room. Meanwhile, the roach approached us from one direction while the spider from the other.

Lucena got down on her knees and began scouring the room. She looked in the wrong direction at first. Meanwhile, the giant bug and spider were getting closer and closer...

Finally, Lucena let out a gasp as she saw our predicament. She rushed over and stepped on the roach and spider. Then she untangled us from the web and brought us to the beach.

We saw the most massive tidal wave we ever saw. Svelena saw Lucena with us. She became angry.

"The little men belongs to me, NOT you!" hollered Svelena.
The Queen came over to investigate the motion. Svelena accused Lucena of "stealing her pets."
The Queen replied, "Young ladies, I do not have time for this. Look out there. A massive tidal wave is headed here and we are powerless to stop it."
Svelena stopped arguing realizing the gravity of the situation. I thought about the irony of the giants being powerless and helpless themselves. Perhaps, NOW, they knew how WE felt.

Lucena stood silent and then gave Todd to Svelena. "You may have Todd."
"Thank you."

The giants stood calmly watching and awaiting their fate. Lucena said, "I'm sorry. I saved you from your deaths only to have you die here with us."
I said, "I suppose it's better being drowned than eaten."

The wave grew larger and larger but then as it got closer, it got smaller. A deafening roar that sounded like a female voice said something. Everybody backed up.
"A big voice just asked for everybody to back up, " said Lucena.
"Lucena...could you loosen your grip? Your fear is almost suffocating me."
"Oh, I'm sorry." She loosened her group.

As the wave subsided a huge shadow encompassed the island. I could not believe it. It was a woman who appeared to be at least 1000 feet tall. In contrast, the giants on this island were 60 to 75 feet tall.
The voice said something but it was too loud and uncomprehendable for me to understand. But several giants ran off and returned with my crew. Lucena said, "I can not believe it. I thought WE were the only giants in the world. She said she comes from an underwater world of giants endowed with magical powers. With their powers, they had been watching us and were dismayed by us playing with you two like toys. She said all living creatures, no matter how small, deserve their freedom."

Then a voice came into my head. "I am sorry. I just realized you little men were too small to understand my audible words so I am using my telepathic powers so you may understand. If I order these giants to release you and your crew, you must promise not to reveal the island of Blobbingrad or my kingdom to any of your countrymen. Can you promise us that?" I looked at Todd and we nodded in agreement.

The giants placed the crew on the ground and Svelena and Lucena placed Todd and myself on the ground. Lucena said, "The giantess said for me to continue showing my love and compassion and perhaps the rest of the Blobbingradians will follow."
"Yes, do that. You are going to make a giant man very proud one day," I said.

"Are you ready to return?" the great giantess asked.
"Yes, but, and I promise, I will not tell, what is the name of your underwater kingdom?"
The great giantess replied, "Atlantis."
We were stunned and then in a flash found ourselves back in our own land with our crew. We are all safe.
"Remember, no more voyages," we heard the female voice say in our heads.
"Of course. What will become of the Blobbingradians?" Todd asked.
"They are free to do as they wish. I have high hopes for Lucena. She may show them the error of their ways. Goodbye."
"Goodbye and thank you."

This all happened forty years ago and I have kept my promise for forty years. But now, I am in my sickbed close to death and I wanted this story to be told. I felt bad for breaking my oath to the Great Giantess that saved us but I doubt anyone will beleive me.

Then I heard a voice I had not heard in 40 years. "No, they will not believe you. Remember, we were endowed with magical powers..." Then the Great giantess laughed a gentle laugh.